Don’t know if you know this or not but data has proven that retail business employees and delivery people steal waaaaay more from the stores they work for than “Shoplifters” do. Insiders know all the angles which give them the best chance of getting away with the crime.
Well, the same can be said for your income. Lot’s of people, are being egged on by the press to blame external forces for their money and personal improvement woes when in fact there’s someone far closer to home that may be to blame.
Answering the following questions for me was tongue lolling-out, stunning, experience.
Now get out a blank piece of paper or go to your super dee duper hard bound journal and write down all of your feelings about wealthy people and success but don’t just write down any feelings. The feelings we’re looking to pull come from answering these specific questions…
- When you think about wealthy people, what kinds of people do you think most of them are?
- How do you feel when someone else has success or wealth? How do you feel emotionally when you see someone else get success or wealth, or do better than you; have a big giant success that you didn’t get any of?
And maybe it’s not “fair”… winning the lottery, inheriting money, bullshit lawsuit, someone selling their business for millions of dollars, friend of yours finds a wallet in the street with $500 bucks in it, with no I.D. and turns it into the cops and no one claims it after a week so he gets to keep the money… whatever the scenario, when a person that’s not you catches a break, what comes up for you emotionally? How do you feel? And then what thoughts are triggered?
This is kind of a rough exercise to do because most people blame other people for their problems because it can be so painful to take responsibility. Also we’ve been reinforced that it’s a good idea, that’s it’s normal for us to feel bad when we witness someone else having wealth or success. Kinda like the blind leading the blind only it’s loser thinking leading to loser thinking.
Eben has found that through knowing hundreds of highly successful people, that by in large, they’re great people. They’re very kind. They’re very generous with their time and with their money. They tend to give away more of what they have than other people and some people might snap, “They should. They have more than everyone else!” That’s not having empathy and going into that person’s world.
Are You Rich?
I could only imagine that if I was making $40,000.00 a year and the people in the slums of Calcutta, India told me I should give them money because I was rich, which in their country I would be, I’d be pretty annoyed.
And one might be tempted to say $40,000.00 is barely enough to live on in this country and it is… if you piss money away. $40,000.00 a year is PLENTY to take care of needs; 3 solid meals a day, roof over your head, clothing on your body. Only when we splurge on “wants” – designer shoes, hand bags, pants, rims for our car, name brand vs. generic grocerys, satellite T.V., having other people cook & serve us our food at restaurants, 80” plasma screen televisions, Ipods, Iphones, vacations, on and on, is $40,000.00 barely enough to live on.
Leave wants out of the equation and even a “rich” person making forty grand has money to send to India.
Now I loooove nice, hell, even luxurious shit. I looove convenience. I just don’t confuse those two with necessities and delude myself into thinking “I’m poor if I don’t have them.” What helps ground me is remembering I live in a country people come to, to build a fortune.
As Jim Rohn said, “No one says, “If I can only get to Denmark, then I’ll make it big.”
Just by the fact that I have access to paved highways, drinkable water, and books makes me wealthier than a lotttttt of people on the planet.
And Eben has found that the more wealthy someone becomes the more benevolent they become. They don’t try to hoard their fortune. They just resent people telling them what they should or shouldn’t do. Just like any other person on the planet does.
Most people when seeing someone else stumble into a windfall, a raise at work, winning the lotto, winning at the casino… they usually feel like they LOST something. They feel like they should get some of that.
Why is it important for us to face these things?
Because we can’t become wealthy if we’re projecting bad feelings onto people who are wealthy or lucky. That’s just common sense when you step back and look at it, but in the heat of the moment when you’re neck deep in it, and you go on auto-pilot and the programming kicks in, it seems normal.
I used to be horrible at this. I’m still far from perfect. But only by mentors like Eben prodding with tough questions have I seen the fault in my thinking.
For instance, I can remember for ages hating the pretty boys, you know, the guys with perfect hair, perfect smiles, perfect clothes, that would get all the hottest girls. I wanted to pull a “Raging Bull”, and bash their face in, tussle their hair and wrinkle their school clothes so they wouldn’t be so pretty anymore. All the better if I could do this in front of the girls so they’d see what a wussbag the guy was.
It was jacked up to level 11 if the guy was “Rich” on top of being a “Hunk.”
Crazy thinking, eh?
Not to me it wasn’t. What was crazy was that I’m a handsome guy, and yet I always thought these were natural thoughts and therefore, never made the connection that these programs were directly responsible for my feeling soooo needy and insecure around girls, especially the ladies who I perceived to be out of my league. DUH!!!
How Do You Overcome Loser Thinking?
Eben is a huge fan of Harv Eker, author of “The Millionaire Mind.” Harv talks about a saying that comes from the Hawaiian Huna Tradition. In Huna they say, “Bless that which you want.”
What you can do from now on anytime you see or hear about a wealthy or successful person, in your mind, is send them a blessing. Send them love and great wishes. Feel happy for them and appreciate for them what life must be like living in their shoes.
Bless That Which You Want.
For this 2nd part of the exercise what you want to do is write down a list of 5-10 wealthy people you can think of; people that you know, that have had good fortune shine upon them and then close your eyes and in your head or out loud say, “Bless You. I really wish you the best.” And feel happy for them.
Now, of course just doing this doesn’t guarantee you’re gonna get rich. It doesn’t guarantee your dream mate’s gonna come seduce you. This does nothing but guarantee you don’t feel like a jealous, insecure shit weasel when in the presence of wealth or greatness.
Do this now so you can take it for checking. Don’t believe me or Eben. Convince yourself of how easy and profound this can be. Close your eyes, go inside and think of those 5-10 people and appreciate, bless, and send them great wishes. Enjoy those great feelings.
Note Taking Nerd #2
PPS. For Eben Pagan‘s personal improvement strategy on how he went from a nobody to a somebody in a crowed niche which allowed him to relocate millions of dollars that previously would’ve gone to Dan Kennedy or Jay Abraham into his pockets, you’ll definitely want to go see this . . .